Time for some bad ancient Asian humor:
Confucius Say:
It's OK to let a fool kiss you; but don't let a kiss fool you.
It's OK to let a fool kiss you; but don't let a kiss fool you.
Confucius Say:
It is better to lose a lover than love a loser.
It is better to lose a lover than love a loser.
Confucius Say:
Viagra is like Disneyland... A one-hour wait for a 2-minute ride.
Confucius Say:
A joke is like sex. Neither is any good if you don't get it.
A joke is like sex. Neither is any good if you don't get it.
And :
Some "Moorish" humor, ie. some of my best friends are Jew-ish!
important facts to remember.
Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
Life is sexually transmitted.
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Meanwhile,
health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky-panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years - unless you give them your email address.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
And in closing:
Finally, I love being politically incorrect. I do not have many more years left to milk it for all it is worth so Merry Christmas , Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas!!!!
important facts to remember.
Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
Life is sexually transmitted.
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Meanwhile,
health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky-panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years - unless you give them your email address.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
And in closing:
The 2017 Darwin Awards
are out...
Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin
Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.
Here is the glorious
winner:
When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended
victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California would-be
robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire
wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger
again. This time it worked.
Honorable mentions:
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a
finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping
round, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The
company expecting negligence sent out one of
its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine
and he also lost a finger.. The chef's claim was
approved.
are out...
Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin
Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.
Here is the glorious
winner:
When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended
victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California would-be
robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire
wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger
again. This time it worked.
Honorable mentions:
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a
finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping
round, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The
company expecting negligence sent out one of
its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine
and he also lost a finger.. The chef's claim was
approved.
A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his
car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle
to find a woman had taken the space.
Understandably, he shot her.
After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a
Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he
was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had
escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence,
the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone
waiting there a free ride.
He then delivered the passengers to the mental
hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very
excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception
wasn't discovered for 3 days.
car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle
to find a woman had taken the space.
Understandably, he shot her.
After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a
Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he
was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had
escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence,
the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone
waiting there a free ride.
He then delivered the passengers to the mental
hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very
excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception
wasn't discovered for 3 days.
An American teenager was in the hospital
recovering from serious head wounds received from an
oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the
lad told police that he was simply trying to see
how close he could get his head to a moving train before he
was hit.
A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a
$20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the
clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked
for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided.
recovering from serious head wounds received from an
oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the
lad told police that he was simply trying to see
how close he could get his head to a moving train before he
was hit.
A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a
$20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the
clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked
for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided.
The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill
on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15.
Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty
badly... He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block
through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So
he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window.
Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty
badly... He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block
through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So
he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window.
The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head,
knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas.
The whole event was caught on videotape.
As a female shopper exited a New York
convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The
clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give
them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within
minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him
in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then
taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive
ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her
That's the lady I stole the purse from."
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that
a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan
at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash..
The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open
The whole event was caught on videotape.
As a female shopper exited a New York
convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The
clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give
them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within
minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him
in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then
taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive
ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her
That's the lady I stole the purse from."
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that
a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan
at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash..
The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open
the cash register without a food order When the man ordered
onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast...
The frustrated gunman walked away.
[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD
WINNER]
When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a
motor home parked on a Seattle street by sucking on a hose,
he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at
the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home
The frustrated gunman walked away.
[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD
WINNER]
When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a
motor home parked on a Seattle street by sucking on a hose,
he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at
the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home
near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted
to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor
home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle
declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had
declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had
and the perp had been punished enough!
Finally, I love being politically incorrect. I do not have many more years left to milk it for all it is worth so Merry Christmas , Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas!!!!
Now for some serious stuff. Every one seems to have a clear understanding what Moore's loss means so I want to give you my two cent read.
I agree with much of the WSJ Editorial.
First: Moore was a lousy candidate and to lose by such a small margin suggests the loss will probably be reversed if and when Jones (the winner) runs again and Alabama Republicans can come up with a worthy middle road conservative. (If Jones was smart he would vote for the tax bill.)
Second: Bannon wants to destroy the current powers who control The Republican Party and he is a very disturbed and angry loose canon. He cannot win with his candidates but he can do damage by causing split votes and forcing rational candidates and/or incumbents to become less so in response to the idiots Bannon may support.
Third: By the time 2018 elections roll round, if the economy is humming and some legislation has been passed that resolves issues like reducing illegitimate welfare, concomitant fraud and solving the issue of immigration in a rational manner, Trump should be a positive campaign umbrella and Republicans should do better than the current doom and gloom mass media dolts project.
Fourth, The mass media will never tell you that Democrats have nothing to offer but misery and hand-wringing. They will have a two year record of obstruction while watching the passing parade and accomplishments, all of which they were against.
Fifth: Since Republicans are their own worst enemy, have little conviction in what they do and professedly believe in, are frightened by their own shadows and do not know how to fight one should never count them out when it comes to losing what they could win.
Republicans are the best thing Democrats have going for them.(See 1 below.)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My Israeli-Arab journalist friends tells it like it is once again. (See 2 below.)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dick
____________________________
1) Alabama Sends a Message
Roy Moore’s defeat shows that Steve Bannon is for losers.
By The Editorial Board
Alabama voters can be forgiven if they preferred to sit out Tuesday’s special Senate election, but those who turned out narrowly elected Democrat Doug Jones to fill the seat vacated by Attorney General Jeff Sessions. The result is a painful lesson for the Alabama Republicans who nominated Roy Moore in the September primary. But it’s also a useful act of political hygiene for the national Republican Party given the accusations of sexual misconduct against the former judge.
The cost of defeat will be high and immediate. Despite his campaign vows to “cross the aisle” to work with Republicans, Mr. Jones will fit right in with Senate Democrats. He will be a reliable vote for Chuck Schumer on any important matter, including judicial nominees. Had he shown even a scintilla of moderation on abortion, for example, he would have won in a rout.
Mr. Moore’s defeat narrows the GOP majority’s margin to 51-49, which will give even more leverage to individual Senators who want to grandstand or satisfy a political constituency. Alabama evangelical Christians who supported Mr. Moore over appointed Sen. Luther Strange in the GOP primary should know that they have now made a conservative Supreme Court nominee less likely if Justice Anthony Kennedy retires in 2018. Senators Lisa Murkowski and Susan Collins will hold the balance of judicial confirmation power, and watch the media lobby them in waves.
Mr. Moore’s loss is also a defeat for former White House aide Steve Bannon, who wants to run challengers to every GOP incumbent next year other than Ted Cruz. Mr. Bannon backed Mr. Moore in the primary, though the judge had been removed twice from the state Supreme Court for refusing to follow a legitimate court order. Mr. Moore was a political self-implosion guaranteed to happen.
The voting in Alabama showed that thousands of Republicans, especially women in the suburbs, either stayed home or crossed over to vote for Mr. Jones. They were rejecting an unacceptable candidate in Mr. Moore, not the national GOP agenda.
The Alabama result shows that Mr. Bannon cares less about conservative policy victories than he does personal king-making. He wants to depose Mitch McConnell as Majority Leader even if it costs Republicans Senate control. GOP voters, take note: Mr. Bannon is for losers.
The Moore defeat should also be a lesson to the Republican Party, and President Trump, that many GOP voters are still at heart character voters. They will only accept so much misbehavior in a politician, no matter the policy stakes. Mr. Trump opposed Mr. Moore in the primary but came around to support him even after the accusations emerged about Mr. Moore’s pursuit of teenage girls while he was in his 30s. The GOP voters who ignored Mr. Trump and rejected Mr. Moore also want a President who acts presidential.
As for Alabama Republicans, they’ll get another shot at Mr. Jones in 2020. Maybe they’ll learn from this debacle and nominate a candidate worthy of support.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
2) Palestinians: Arab Rulers are Traitors, Cowards
By Khaled Abu Toameh
- The decision to boycott a visit later this month by US Vice President Mike Pence comes in the context of absorbing the anger of the street. Abbas and his Palestinian Authority have also made it clear that they no longer consider the Trump administration an “honest” and “unbiased” broker in any peace process with Israel. As such, the Palestinian Authority leadership announced that it will reject any peace plan proposed by the Trump administration, even if the plan gains the support of Arab countries such as Saudi Arabia and Egypt.
- The Palestinian strategy now is to work hard to thwart any peace plan coming from the Trump administration. The Palestinians are convinced that Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman and other Arab leaders are cooking up a new “conspiracy” behind their backs — with the aim of “liquidating” the Palestinian cause by imposing an acceptable solution on them. This, of course, has nothing to do with Trump's announcement on Jerusalem. This has been the Palestinian position even before Trump made his announcement, and it is unlikely to change after.
- The question now is: How will the Arab regimes respond to this latest charge of fratricide leveled against them by their Palestinian brothers?Once again, the Palestinians are disappointed with their Arab brothers.A declaration of war on the US, in the Palestinians' view, would have been the appropriate response to US President Donald Trump's December 6 announcement recognizing Jerusalem as Israel's capital.For the Palestinians, the anti-US demonstrations that took place in some Arab countries such as Egypt, Jordan, Tunisia, Iraq and Lebanon were a welcome development.But the protests have evidently failed to satisfy the appetite of the Palestinians, who were banking on the Arab heads of state and governments to take more drastic measures against the US.The Palestinians are not expecting the Arab and Islamic armies to march on the White House or bomb New York and Los Angeles.All they have gotten so far from the Arab and Islamic leaders and governments are demonstrations on the streets and statements of condemnations. Moreover, it does not look as if the Palestinians should be expecting more from their Arab and Muslim brothers.The sense of let-down on the Palestinians' part is large: the streets of the West Bank and Gaza Strip are rising with chants labeling the Arab and Muslim leaders and regimes as “traitors” and “puppets” in the hands of Israel and the US.Almost every Palestinian protester interviewed in the past few days about the Trump announcement spoke also of the “weakness” and “cowardice” of the Arab and Islamic heads of state.Welcome to the Palestinian mindset, where an Arab leader who talks about peace with Israel is a traitor, while an Arab leader who talks about destroying Israel or launching rockets at it, like Saddam Hussein, is a “hero.”Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, who is rumored to be working with the Trump administration on a new peace plan to solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, is being dubbed a “traitor” and “collaborator” by many Palestinians. Likewise, Egypt's President Abdel Fattah Sisi is being accused by many Palestinians of being too soft on Israel and the US and in collusion with the Trump administration.Hassan Nasrallah, on the other hand, the secretary-general of the Iranian-backed Hezbollah, who has called for a new intifada against Israel, is being hailed as a “hero.” So are his Iranian masters.A Bahraini Interfaith group that visited Israel with a message of peace and conciliation was met with Palestinian anger. The Palestinians accused the Bahraini delegation of promoting “normalization with the Zionist entity.”When Palestinians heard that the members of the Bahraini group might visit the Gaza Strip, they waited for them with eggs and shoes to throw at them at the entrance to the Gaza Strip. The Bahraini delegates later denied that they had planned a visit to the Gaza Strip. However, this did not stop Palestinian protesters from condemning the Bahrainis.Echoing the embitterment towards the Arab “impotence” and “weak” response to Trump's announcement, Palestinian Authority (PA) President Mahmoud Abbas said that statements issued by governments and leaders were inadequate in the extreme. In a message to the Arab Parliament, Abbas expressed disappointment that the Arab and Islamic countries did not take tougher measures in response to Trump's announcement.For Abbas, the condemnations alone were “meaningless”. At a minimum, he stated, the Palestinians were expecting that Arabs and Muslims would throw the US ambassadors out of their countries, shut down US embassies, cut off their diplomatic relations with the US, or boycott US officials and delegations and goods.“Rejecting or saying that the [Trump] decision is null and void is insufficient,” Abbas said. “We expect a series of measures and steps that would rise to the level of the event.”The reaction of the Palestinian street to the Arab and Islamic “apathy” has been even stronger, especially after the meeting of the Arab League foreign ministers in Cairo to discuss the Trump announcement.“As far as I'm concerned, all the Arabs are not worth two shekels,” commented a Palestinian interviewed in Ramallah.” Another Palestinian remarked: “There are no Arabs or Muslims left.” A third Palestinians said, “I find it strange that there are still some Arabs who expect anything good to come out of the Arab league. When will the Arabs wake up?”“Anyone who expects the weary Arab regimes to defend Jerusalem is living under an illusion,” said Palestinian political analyst Mohammed Ismail Yassin. “All one should expect from these regimes is more failure. The Arab regimes are busy shedding the blood of their people.”Meanwhile, it seems that the Palestinians are disgusted not only with the Arab leaders, but also with their own president, Abbas. A Palestinian public opinion poll published this week showed that 70% of the Palestinians want Abbas to resign. Three months ago, 67% of the Palestinians interviewed for another poll said they wanted Abbas to resign. The latest poll found that Palestinians favor more hardline leaders such as Fatah's imprisoned leader, Marwan Barghouti, and Hamas leader Ismail Haniyeh.The Palestinians are fed up with Abbas because, among other things, they believe he is not being tough enough with Israel. Many would like to see Abbas cancel the Oslo Accords with Israel and openly endorse the “armed struggle.” They also want him to halt security coordination with Israel. In an attempt to appease the Palestinian street, Abbas and his top officials have resorted to inflammatory rhetoric against Israel and the Trump administration.The decision to boycott a visit this month by US Vice President Mike Pence comes in the context of absorbing the anger of the street. Abbas and his Palestinian Authority have also made it clear that they no longer consider the Trump administration an “honest” and “unbiased” broker in any peace process with Israel. As such, the Palestinian Authority leadership announced that it will reject any peace plan proposed by the Trump administration, even if the plan gains the support of Arab countries such as Saudi Arabia and Egypt.
Mahmoud Abbas and his Palestinian Authority have made it clear that they will reject any peace plan proposed by the Trump administration. Pictured: Abbas speaks during the U.N. General Assembly on September 20, 2017. (Photo by Kevin Hagen/Getty Images)The Palestinian strategy now is to work hard to thwart any peace plan coming from the Trump administration. The Palestinians are convinced that Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman and other Arab leaders are cooking up a new “conspiracy” behind their backs — with the aim of “liquidating” the Palestinian cause by imposing an acceptable solution on them. This, of course, has nothing to do with Trump's announcement on Jerusalem. This has been the Palestinian position even before Trump made his announcement, and it is unlikely to change after.The Palestinians have placed themselves on a collision course not only with the US, but also with the Arab world. The question now is: How will the Arab regimes respond to this latest charge of fratricide leveled against them by their Palestinian brothers?Khaled Abu Toameh, an award-winning journalist, is based in Jerusalem.
